I've never known love like this before!

Dear Mobile Office,
Listen, I know yall tired. I tired too..but I reaaallly am askin yall to hold on, ok? I need ya! It's real out hurr in deez streets! We are gettin some really good important work done so don't think Mama don't know how valuable your efforts are.One day we will get funding to make sure you guys get regular checkups and counseling sessions. Laptop, I PROMISE I will get you a new left click button and therapy for your anger issues. Phone I promise we will put an APB out on your occasional missing voice and amnesia from time to time. Bluetooth your sleep disorder is getting looked into. Printer we will get you something to drink direckly. Yall just hoooollld on. Things are gonna get better and your work will NOT be in vain! We are almost there with our Talented 10 for 10/10 to get 10 people to donate $10 each on Oct 10 to help Emerging Leaders Mentoring Program! All we need is 5 more to commit! A whole lotta people's lives are gonna be better because of yall and we'll get you some help ok? Ok! That's the spirit! I love yall! mmmuah!
Sincerely,
Mama

Smooches!

Respect the sway!

 

Pajamas are the new power suit!

II've been around the world in 24 hours! Ok not the world but I definitely left my footprint on I85. I drove from Charlotte to Atlanta and back to Charlotte in a matter of 23 hours and 46 minutes. In between the round-trip I did a presentation for TruChatOnline.com's "I Love Me" pajama party during Fro Fashion Week (FFW) in Atlanta. *whew that was a mouthful* I had a BLAST! First of all, I feel that pajama pants should be voted as the official article of clothing for all hard workers that DON'T get any sleep. lol This way it seems like we did. *shoulder shrug* Just a thought. 

Anywho I had the opportunity to share my passion for inspiring and training youth on simple strategies to be positive and going after their dreams. I've had my share of sitting in the classroom or at an assembly while my students were bored to death by a presenter or guest speaker that meant well but just didn't deliver the message in a way that captured the students' attention or got them involved so that the message DID stick. Sad but true...so I'm pleased to announce that I haven't lost any "patients" on the operating table! That's what 14+ years as a public school teacher in some of the most challenging schools will do for you...it gives you chops! *blowing on my knuckles*

I got to talk about goals and journaling as well as what to do when dream killers come a-knockin! I was in the zone! Got to meet and bond with Ms. Jess of the Jessicurl hair care line, and The Sistah Chick, and Serial Thinker, and Oh Nikka and BigHairBrwnEyes and Tarin of FFW and of course Julia who is the mastermind behind TruChatOnline.com. Oh and shout out to Julia's mom who was right there supporting HER daughter in her dreams just like mine does for me! Moms rock! *sighing smile* It was just a good ol' fashioned love fest at the Smyrna Community Center! Last night I didn't even understand the magnitude of what happened until I got back here in Charlotte and just sat still. My purpose was to go and talk to almost 50 lil brown gurls about HOW to go after their dreams instead of just SAYING "believe in your dreams".

 I think I had more fun than them! What I didn't realize was 3 things 1) I just connected with major bloggers in Atlanta and THE owner of a major hair care product that crosses ethnic lines. This owner didn't say "if you come to California" but "WHEN you come to California" with the calendar launch parties I have planned for my Knotty Gurl project...HELLO! VISION=OPPORTUNITIES FALLING IN YOUR LAP especially when you are genuinely giving back 2.) A lil gurl RAN up to me after my presentation and presented me with a sticky note that said You are the best! and gave me a huge hug! No explanation needed for how that made me feel. *tear and bottom lip tremble* But the best part of last night 3.) seeing my son Nick in action with the camera and having teachable moments of doing unusual things in order to make your dream happen as well as have experiences you keep with you for a lifetime! He fully understood and was a professional in his responsibilities as videographer and photographer. He's so creative and swift until it's kinda scary, but I love letting him flex his artistic muscles. Of course he likes to flex his future muscles too. I just chuckle and keep hope alive for the bird whose chest he hijacked smh He's a soldier and I'm proud of all that he has endured in his soon to be 7 years of life. 
So my moral of the story: Find out what gives you FREEDOM, make up your mind to do it, and don't look back. When (not if) you get a clue of what your purpose is and how to give back, be fully committed to making it happen. No excuses. I can't do have any excuses because my Great Great Great Grandmother is watching me very closely...that pic from my last blog "Puzzle pieces make me cry" is now my phone wallpaper. I don't have a choice BUT to push forward. Do what's hard while it's easy. I'm actually doing it while it's hard...behind the scenes ain't pretty, but it makes it all the sweeter...and to think, I did all of this in my pajamas! POWERFUL!

Smooches!

Respect the Sway...no matter how young and tiny it is :-)

Puzzle pieces make me cry

Imagine getting a phone call from your mother saying check your email and she won't tell me what she sent. I open it and I look and she says.."this is your Great Great Grandmother who birthed me." Tears just start flowing because you finally get a maj

or puzzle piece you've been waiting for! Everyone please meet my Great Great Grandmother Lydia on the left, my Great Great Grand Uncle Ike and his wife my Great Great Grand Aunt Elizabeth. 
I remember being about 5 months pregnant and going to a family reunion on my mother's side in Yemassee, SC on Cherokee Plantation. This is a huge piece of land that is now some sort of private resort and we had to get permission to enter. How ironic. My ancestors built it and I have to ask if it's ok to walk on it. *blank stare* But I understand business is business. We toured the land and there were several things that took my breath away. The reservoir that was gorgeous was built by my ancestors...no tractor trailers, no riding lawnmowers....just their buckets, and shovels and their body. *taking a breath* Then walking through the front door of the "Big House" and my mother gets emotional. It's the first time she's ever walked in there through the FRONT door even though she was born on that land. The final moment that will always stick with me. We found the grave of my Great Great Grandmother Lydia who was the midwife for my mother's birth. *closing my eyes and picturing the women welcoming my mother into the world and taking care of my Granny* Simple puzzle pieces. Tears for days. I now know what my son felt like when he got to finally meet his father for the first time. He had an expression of peace. To be so young and to have such an acknowledgement of who he is just speaks volumes to me now. I couldn't relate to his frustration because I grew up with both of my parents. I felt helpless because I didn't know what to say since I hadn't experienced that pain. Remember my post about pain being the gift no one wants but that everyone needs? It gives you empathy and I couldn't empathize with my own son, until now. To know where you came from puts puzzle pieces in their rightful place. That's HUGE! and such a terror to my sinuses! lol **blowing nose and sanitizing hands to continue typing**

Puzzle pieces. It makes even more sense why a puzzle is the symbol for Autism Awareness. All of the pieces are there but just to have them all fit together at the right time is the struggle. Having had some students who were autistic, I have a small inkling of an idea of what a mother of a child with autism must go through. Waiting eagerly for a puzzle piece to fall into its rightful place. I'm sure tears fall when it happens. I know it did whenever I got that to happen for that student who struggled. Puzzle pieces make me cry.

My mother always wondered what her Great Grandmother looked like. When she called me tonight and I heard the peace in her voice, I was elated for her. Her puzzle piece that she had been looking for allllll these years fell into place! My 3G Ma didn't take no mess from NOOOOOOBODY!! Can't you tell from her expression? And her daughter, My Great Grandmother, was Big Hat who was the ONLY woman on Cherokee Plantation with a car! POW! Now is it making sense how I got the way I am? I can't help BUT to grind daily and go wherever I need to go to make it happen! It's in my bloooood! lol I love it and I won't let their lives be in vain! EVERY opportunity that comes my way and it allows me to continue building a legacy that has their blood, sweat, and tears on it will be taken! I can't wait until my Big Hat puzzle pieces falls into its space!! OH and FYI, Cherokee Plantation the very land MY ancestors built is said to have caught Oprah's attention. Hmmmm.

Smooches!

Respect the Sway...and your puzzle!

 

 — 

Saaaaaaaandra!

LOL! Remember when Jackee Harry used to play Sandra Clark on 227?? She was FABULOUS before the word even existed in its current meaning! I loooved her hair, her smile, her energy and her DRIVE! You ever noticed that she was always dressed like she knew she was important and coming and going ALL the time! Either to work or out on a date...lol She had it together and wasn't a floozy! Successful,hardworking, feminine, and happy! 

Now watch this...who was always talking about her? Maaaaaarrryy! lol Why? I still don't know why? My guess was jeallllouuussyy and for no  reason. If you ever paid attention, you ever notice that Sandra was hardly EVER sitting on the stoop with Mary, Rose, and Pearl in that doggone window...weren't the purple hats around then? Pearl needed a hobby! Mary and Rose needed to do something with allll of their extra time. Of course I believe in unwinding but when you use your "free time" to constantly talk about Sandra who happens to be living life and being active, then you have TOO much free time on your hands. 

Nothing gets my cotton boy shorts in a bunch more than people who ALWAYS have something negative to say about someone elses efforts to uplift the community, better yourself, go after your dreams. Oh it's always said, let your haters be your motivators. I know I know...it's just that I am a thinker and always trying to find rationales behind behavior. Why do hurt people try to hurt people? Just analyzing the crap outta each and everything trying to find something wrong. *insert fashionable jacket that makes you hug yourself* Yes that's is CRAZY! Who does that? smh Not I, said the cat! I love to see people succeed! It makes me want to keep striving for excellence. Maybe they are angry because the bar has been raised again everytime someone does well and now they feel like another person's perserverance magnifies their complacency and they don't like that crap! lol That's it! I have figured it out! lol Yall stop magnifying all the stoop squatters with all your action and goals and workshops and agendas and networking and praise reports! Shame on ya! *taking my meds so I can snap out of it*

What's really sad is the fact these stoop squatters have the same resources ,if not more, as the ones who are diligently working to make things happen with little to no tools. There are people, young and old, who wish they could do what stoop squatters don't take the time to..and that's get up, get out, and DO something productive. **sweeping my stoop** Excuse the dust.

Oh before I go..here's a prime example of some young people who want to avoid being stoop squatters but are in a bad situation right now. 

Ok here's the situation: there's 3 groups of students I want to do a workshop for through my nonprofit www.GeechieGurl.org but they don't have a budget to get the specific supplies I need to do what I do...one of those groups happens to be incarcerated teens in Charlotte. To do it by next month before November, I need to raise some moola. If I can get 12 businesses to do 1 month of Text Alertz on www.5linx.net/ealcox/products, it wil be COVERED! We get a portion of the proceeds from that purchaes or ANY purchase for that matter!! **CONFETTI* You know I did the math! Can ya help yourself which will end up helping us to help students? Wow now THAT'S a Saaaaaaandra moment!

Smooches!

Respect the Sway! 

Lumpy Rugs...

will always make you stumble and hurt yourself and possibly others. What doesn't make sense is the fact that you were the one that swept the debris and mess under there in the first place. I'm sure you can tell that I've been glued to the tv watching Iyanla Vanzant's "Fix My Life" as she interviews Evelyn from Basketball Wives Reality (HA!) show on VH1. I'm in awe of the things we, male and female, ignore in order to get the things we desire at the moment. The temporary fix with the price tag of permanent damage. How do we silence our intellect, a God given customized gift for humans only, so much that we put ourselves and our soul in danger? To substitute meaningful relationships and decisions with shallow and empty ties and choices is a failure of epic proportions. The domino effect of all that will take place is saddening and destructive...not only for ourselves, but for everyone whose space we enter and dwell.

I know for a fact that my son will forever have a strange relationship with money because of how hard we have to struggle and how hard I work to make things as efficient as possible since I am the head of household.. My son is used to me giving him a dollar to put in the collection plate at church. Today in church, he saw I had no dollar bills at all in my wallet and I gave him some change. He tried to give it back and said, " I don't want you to waste your money." My heart sank and I told him that I was ok because we were giving money to God as a thank you for blessing us in so many ways. I can't predict the future. I don't know what direction his attitude will be with finances, super saver or major spender, because of the experiences he's having now. Also, how will this translate in his relationships with women..will he choose gold diggers to prove himself "manly" and worthy or independent women who feel a need to prove themselves? Of course, i'm a worried mother who is doing the "overreaction" thing. *plz email my official mommy membership pkg* All of this comes from making a poor choice in who I picked to create life with..ignored what I was taught by my father and turned a blind eye to the subtle signs that I should've had a V-8 instead. I love my son more than life itself. I'm a work in progress for forgiving myself for the life I created for him as a child without one of his parents. *swinging my double edged sword* I wouldn't have my Nick if I didn't allow the lump under my rug to grow. You sweep, you learn and you move on.

Nowadays, I've taken a strong liking to hardwood floors and no area rugs in sight. Someone from my past didn't get the memo that my old self had taken up permanent residence at the beach. He approached me as if though "she" was still on the clock. I immediately notified him of the change in management. His delivery immediately shifted. Clarity is a beautiful thing...and so is a freshly waxed hardwood floor.Easier on your sinuses and easier to see your beautiful reflection for daily maintenance. When you come to visit, leave your shoes and your blues on the porch.

Smooches!

Respect the Sway

Weak in the knees

I FINALLY used my birthday massage gift card today that I got back in March for my 40th this year. After the first 5 minutes, the therapist actually sounded like he was concerned about me "You really needed this". I'm convinced he gave me an upgraded pkg from what I was supposed to have. I was literally weak when he was done and it took me a minute to really get it together good enough to drive. I know when to say when with my drive and ambition, however when you are battling circumstances and the clock, how do you even begin to slow down? With BMW's (not the car) and responsibilities on my mind every second, I feel there is no room for a relax take it easy moment. I don't like that feeling. I hate the fact that nonprofits do some of the most influential work just like all service industry occupations and either can't afford to get therapeutic services like massages and other stress relieving strategies on a regular basis. Not just financially but having the time to do it. I can't help to think about teachers in Chicago. Being a former teacher, I'm so proud of them for standing up for what they and every teacher in this country deserves. Fair pay and respect. I can't count the number of times I've seen someone say teachers should stop whining because we have summers off. Well if that break is not as much of a mental health leave of absence, then why do parents rejoice at the very thought of summer vacation (just 2 months) being over? I mean good grief even commercials show parents' bliss! *insert commercial of father free gliding on shopping cart full of school supplies as "It's the most wonderful time of the year" plays in the background* and these are just THEIR kids!

I pray that one day this country sees the value of our teachers beyond  teacher appreciation week and that week is special only if you're lucky enough to have a working PTA smh There's just something about getting pencils as a teacher appreciation gift. **crickets** True story.

It shouldn't take a strike to get the attention of others. I am just sitting here picturing the domino effect...no teacher..nowhere for kids to go..parent in a state of chaos..local businesses minus employees to operate said business..business loses profit and productivity. Conclusion: Not respecting teachers can lead to this country being brought to it's knees. Dramatic? Maybe...or maybe not... You know what's really ironic? That massage gift card came from 2 of my former students back during the 2009 school year. Thank you Kelly and Wendy for making my career as a public school teacher a very fond memory.

Smooches!
Respect the Sway...and the teachers!

The Lord giveth...

Even when He taketh away. How many times have we experienced a loss that taught us a lesson that made us a better person? I woke up this morning grateful for another day but noticeably kind of sad. I knew why and you'll have to wait for my book to find out, but I looked at the date and felt a little emptier. This was definitely going to be a day to sit still and stay inside. *sigh*
No greater loss has been experienced by this country in recent times like the events of 9/11. I remember that day vividly as I'm sure we all do. I was in Gastonia, NC on the first day of medical leave from from teaching job. It was some of the best sleep I could remember having and then I turned on the tv and was shocked to my core. I recall going to the grocery store and stocking up on food and calling loved ones to say I love you. I even called a former boyfriend who we were on the splits and silent treatment and we told each other we loved the other. Unfortunate that it sometimes  takes tragedy to be civil towards others. Thank God for growth.
Today so many showed their tributes in the form of pictures, poems, cards, etc. On Facebook a very dear friend and fellow entrepreneur posted that she was doing an act of kindness (Krispy Kreme doughnuts mmmm) for her local fire dept and I was inspired to do the same. She told me I need not even think about doughnuts and to whip up what she has named Lemon Cupcrack! Lol yes its just that good! I said she was right and that surely I could crank out a cake for those who would put their life on the line to save me if I for some reason forgot how to cook and set the kitchen on fire.
It was indeed an honor to do it and I actually got blessed unexpectedly in the process!
Here's the link for the Talk to Me Tuesday video I will always cherish.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QRLwJzd4xX8&feature=youtube_gdata_player

The Lord giveth. In tragedy and in triumph, the Lord giveth. Period.
Smooches!
Respect the Sway!

Its a small world after all!

Not really talking about the degrees of separation here. Do you see what i see in the picture? I see being cooperative, humble, active, protective and determined! Don't see it? Look closer...it's a smooth flowing trail of ants! Come on somebody! I know you get how I see all of that, right? *waiting for just one head nod*
Cooperative- there is a master plan that every ant is following. Even if some stray from the trail, they are still going in the same direction! Translation: Everyone's got a point of view and ideas based on their experiences. Don't be afraid to try others' suggestions and be open to variety as long as it doesn't pull you away from the vision and goal at hand.
Humble- I'm looking to see if there's an ant wearing a tiny MVP jersey *getting magnifying glass but then remembering it's a sunny day and that would just be mean* Not one of them are LOOKING for the spotlight ...each ant is doing its job to the best of it's ability because they know their value. If they don't do it, the rest have to work that much harder and that aint right..especially when they benefit from the fruits of the labor! Translation: Do your part ...do we really need to break this down? Yeah i guess we do. There's no need for announcements of what you have accomplished unless you are giving ALL the glory to God. I mean He IS the proud sponsor of the whole shabang, right?
Active- as one of my TweetPeas Pentherapee says, I lalalala luv this word! Lol it means you are dodododoing ! These lil suckas are wasting no time *clocking some at record speeds* Can you get anymore focused and in the zone? The job at hand is getting done! No 3 hour meetings with novels as powerpoint presentations (thats a whole other blog smh) to discuss the "but's" and the "if only's". They strategized the "how" and are on the ACTION! Ok I'm gonna break this down just for the fun of it! Ready? Translation: Shuddup and make it happen! Lol
*attention shoppers we have a 2 for 1 special on protective and determined* Ever stepped in an ant pile? Yes yesss honey! They don't play that! Unh unh they will not be stopped and they will join forces to let you know you don't just come and disrupt their space or their business! Ok i refuse to translate this! We are the only creatures,  according to popular opinion, with intellect! Why don't we get it? Don't get me wrong...some of us do get it but good lawd! When some of us DON'T... EPIC FAIL! *deep sigh*
I still have high hopes for us all. (Can't talk about ants and not sing the song, people! ) I by no means am a saint. I do have a past. We all do. When does that past get to serve its purpose of making our world small like an ant's? Trivial things don't matter and things that matter aren't very trivial. Thats a downsize I'm learning to love more and more!
Smooches!
Respect the Sway!

BMW's don't always mean luxury!

Be sure to check your baggage...and i don't mean like the TSA. Today i witnessed a bitter woman acting out based on her bitterness. It was sad, infuriating, and hurtful. One thing I know for sure is I've really grown emotionally and spiritually. The old me would've really been very "vocal" while using bleep-worthy phrases with a rhythm that possessed an iambic pentameter poets envy. Smh
I understand some of the darkest moments in a person's life make them respond to things differently however a painful past experience is not a permit for being a mean person. Sorry but too many females are a prime example of this behavior. *getting ill at the thought of how many tv producers are using this as a foundation for their business plan*
I am so through with BMW's...Bitter Mad Women! So we'll make this short with a notice and a note
Notice:Baggage is meant for vacation. Check yours and keep it in its proper place and make sure it doesn't interfere with anyone else's space so they can have a pleasant journey. 

Note:Dear Old Self, 

Chile I am toooo proud of you and how you just have pretty much gone on permanent vacation! Now I know you stopped slurping your tropical adult beverage, sat up in your beach chair, lifted up your sun hat and looked over the top of your shades at me and the earlier situation, but you didn't akk a donkey! I know you got my back but God has our front back and sides so continue enjoying your vacay! You've earned it! I got this! 

Smooches,

New Self ;-)

Respect the Sway!  

In the meantime...

Excuse me while i dust off my blog *plucking dust bunnies and cobwebs off the screen* I haven't written in a week seems like. It's been a busy...no let me change that ..it's been a productive week. I have alot of ideas and the type of person i am, I put them into action. I'm visiting Charlotte, NC where I used to be a teacher for 50 billion years and it was a strange feeling coming back. I almost felt like i was moving backwards but after reconnecting with former coworkers, students, friends, and possibilities, I've officially labeled this as my "meantime". Yes i like to label and name things...it gives it a purpose and purpose gives relevance to things. Relevance makes things matter. What I'm doing now, matters. I've had aha moments out the wazoo! Oprah would be so proud...speaking of my angel of a role model, i was watching Soul Sunday on OWN and she was interviewing a family that had experienced the loss of a child. The mother said something that made me literally stop in my tracks...not being held down by anything and having the freedom to move about as they pleased. Now don't misunderstand. This wasnt in reference to a child being a burden. Not at all. In fact, their child was a young adult. I understood it as their grieving showed them their lives were waiting on them to live it. That's what i realize and am learning from my "meantime". I can come and go as I so choose. No sick leave to worry about. No explaining why I can't stay in the confines of 4 walls for 8 hours. I do believe I've worked harder in the last 7 months than i have in the the last 3 years! And I LOVE it because it's for MY dream and the betterment of peoples' lives. God is so very good and I'm His #1 fan because NOBODY takes better care of you than He does!
I miss the hustle of Atlanta and the excitement of being surrounded by dream chaserschasers on a daily basis. Now I haven't moved! Lol my stuff is in storage in the ATL...so I will be right back lol But in the "meantime", I've got dreams to build and turn into reality...lets just say I'm tending to my gardens filled with seeds Ive planted all over the place! I'm getting ready for my harvest.
Smooches!
Respect the sway!